So she farted while we were having sex but I was afraid she would stop because she was emberessed so i just went ahead and took the blame and apologized
FYI..good luck when you get back from work.. mom and dad know about the boy you brought home last night
haha good one..how did you even know?
we all know. he obviously didn't leave when you might have told him to.. he came down when we were eating because he coud smell mom's cooking. the dude ate with us and offered to say grace. so yeah, good luck.
I had a dream last night that I was the one that killed Biggie
is it wrong that i woudl like to tie u down to the baby changing station using the straps provided?
Crosby and Malkin: Two girls, one cup.
I just farted for five sidewalk sections! New personal best.
By the way, your roommate is right. His penis is much bigger than yours.
Its ok. I handled the situation with grace and class. lol jk i got shitfaced and fucked his roomate.
Your brother came in a girls mouth for the first time last night... Ah the tales told whilst buying minors beer.
How do you feel about fucking me quick and then me leaving to go do arts and crafts?
I remember having the weirdest thoughts and thinking our room was a compass and we were in the compass or something.
I should come with a warning like "do not feed me tequila or cocaine, I will ruin the party and cry"
just yelled CURVEBALL at my nightie because it turned out to be a pair of shorts
My house is about to be spotless and the only person visiting is the plumber and not the porno kind.
I felt like I crashed a wedding. Everyone was dressed so nice and I was covered in actual dirt and a little blood.
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