yeah i was sneaking up to her room and on the way i saw a picture of her and left
Brandy, I need a picture of your boobs. Not time to explain.
I took a shit in your bathtub. Nothings off limits
Ordered a large pizza and definitely just paid the cab driver in pizza slices. I'm glad there's someone out there that's just as fat at heart as we are.
hung over. covered in somebodies makeup. and ready to drink.
I think the Predator is hunting me in my house. If I don't text you later, send Danny Glover. I love you all.
I'll ask around, all of my friends have girlfriends now for the most part though so they're all dead inside
She's impossible to please. Other than with two fingers and a tongue.
In 2009 his now husband dressed in a sailor onesie and heels for pride so he needs to REMEMBER how to party
Woke up with a $50 attached to my penis with a rubber band..
Sweet. Tell little Richard to buy us a sack and a pizza.
He sent me a snap of him eating a tamale shirtless. I think I might be in love.
LOCK HIM DOWN.
What kind of terrible faithless God would allow vodka and one ply toilet paper to coexist?
I got her number but I don't think I'll be able to smash, I was pretending to be British AND I forgot her name
I wanna borrow his axe at this point and cut my head open just to relieve some pressure
Its like he got lessons from Jesus on how to use his tongue. And his dick.
Randomize