Cool, I just put that together. I didn't know if using a tie-died sub machinegun was too crazy
shit is crazy. i just keep thinking that this kid growing inside Emily used to live in my balls.
dude smells like cheese burgers and loose women...... i want his life
I am wasted and people are fist pumping. This should not happen on the west coast.
Thank you for getting us into that car accident. I have had more guys hit on me than ever before because of my broken fingers.
i got shots of sambuca dumped on my head last night. my bag still smells like licorice. making me nauseous.
it is a nice little reminder of the bruins dominance. if Vancouver had won, it would somehow smell of maple syrup.
Im sleeping in your bed. Sorry for the sand and the noise and the loud people. Im starving
Your blankets are not drunk friendly
How bad is it that I'm banned from all of your family functions due to sleeping w/ both your brother and sister and they both hate me for pursing a relationship with either of them.
While we were driving she just screams from the backseat: MUMFORD AND SONS DROP THE BANJO and made what were meant to be banjo sound effects
Im calling you paparazzi cause of all the dick pics you take of your one night stands ps loved the panoramic one!
Hold on - sidebar. My best friend just threw a 40 pack of condoms through my window.
Funny how the post-sex UTI lasted longer than the entire relationship.
Just ate an entire BBQ chicken pizza this better go to my tits
Pooping with Eye of the Tiger playing. Not a single fuck shall be given.
Made it to the top o the stairs ALIVE YES FUCJ YOU GRAVITY
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