but i am gonna have to have sex w/ him again to get my earrings back
tonight's goal was "most regrettable decision" and you bring wine coolers?
blowing a .13 at 10 AM isn't nearly as cool as I thought it would be.
I'm just trying to think of how much money Little Debbie would make if pot was legalized.
I couldn't open my car door and for a second I thought they were taking me to an intervention circle.
Drinking down Plan B with a 5 hour energy. Winding down welcome week in style.
What can I say, I'm a giver.
Smoking up the homeless at 3am does not make you a humanitarian.
You are softly singing to the wall while slow dancing with it. I feel as though you should discontinue this behavior.
God she is annoying. I am only keeping her around on fb because I want to see if her baby comes out looking like an alien or not.
I'm gonna fingerblast you when you get off work. Get ready.
my first words to him the next morning were "do you like magic"?
Dude, I came home and you were passed out halfway through the front door in your Minnie Mouse outfit... with a beer still in hand
Ive been high since the plane left the ground in Los Angeles and Ive been in Chicago. Right now, Im on a train headed towards downtown to go to an anime convention. At this point, I am just taking life as it comes, furries and all.
That moment during finals day when you either convince your teacher to let you out of the room or you shit you pants.
You’re going to be a doctor, and I’m going to be a trophy wife. We both have goals
Randomize
