What a fucking waste of an outfit
A little girl and i are having a face making battle in mcdonalds
She started it, but I totally finished it.
I gave my ex the dutch oven last night. How was your night?
This may sound mean but have u ever just sat in class and look at some of the the people and think how disappointed their parents must be
if i remember New Year's Eve then there is something seriously wrong.
is asking a girl out on a date while in another girls bed in poor taste?
I just ate four packages of Swiss Rolls. Being high and on food stamps is AHmazing.
She pulled out a handful of chest hair. And then gave the room a Brave Heartesque speech.
We're about to go to a party titled 'Night of 1000 Jello Shots".
we were looking for paper towels to wrap his hand and i yanked a drawer out of the cabinet, it was fun so we just kept doing it. things escalated and long story short, he isn't gettin his security deposit back
Because nothing screams stable like yelling at a guy in a bar because last time you hooked up he stole your underwear.
For real, I've been ditched by my boyfriend twice today alone. I fucking shaved for this guy.
Somewhere out there, Gloria Steinem just started to cry.
Just go to your happy place. Mine is with Jake Gyllenhaal & schnapps
I remember us getting kicked out of the bar, but neither of us know why. We woke up next to chicken bones on a plate with spoons, and my car has mud all over it including places where feet shouldn't be, like the speakers on the car door.
So I just realized I have three bananas, seven condoms, three lube packets, three tampons, and a shot glass in my bag but no pen #modelstudent
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