so i told my doctor my symptons and she just shook her head at me
There are 9 condoms on my bed either i met the greatest girl ever last night or something horrible has happened.
I feel I need to conquer him. He's six ft eight and 265lbs. Its like the mount Everest of sex.
i have rugburns grass stains and some road rash. im an all terrain slut
that awkward moment when your booty call gets snowed in at your place.
Hi future me, I saved you a big mac under the bed.
Sorrye. The bathtuv says hi. But theresno water in it. I've wanted too tell you for the longest, but nevr could
Nice. The Governor's son bruised my vagina.
That's going to be the title of my memoir.
She came out of my bathroom wearing nothing but high top Converse, a leather jacket and a tongue stud. I love rock bars.
Two words: blizzard sex
His favorite positions involve choking me out. I'm marrying him.
Slammed 3 beers and just bowled a 129\nI guess alcohol IS the answer
This is the best 30th birthday ever. In a Motel 6 drinking a shower beer and sending slow-mo dick helicopter videos to you.
He's finally divorcing her, so naturally he tells me that we're not exclusive anymore. His penis 'wants what it wants' apparently.
Don't worry. I have logic.... just not morals.
Randomize
