i felt like the dude nobody likes from the mikes hard lemonade commercial
wouldnt it be awesome if walks of shame were like charity walks...you could get sponsors and shit and donate money to curing STDs or cancer
I am soup sandwich. I have been at dAnce party
if you spike my cofee one more time im gona fuck you up. im presenting to the mayor in sevven fucking minuets. fuck you and youir fucking bartending classses i am so fuckign fcked
i broight you flpweers amd vodka. open yoir bask door
We had a 30 min conversation last night about whether or not to bone that girl with a lisp to see if she moans with one...
Well I almost walked away with an Irish guy's boarding pass and some south guy's dignity
The feeling are messing with the penis
I left when you were using your mug to lay on the street and ask for spare change
She didn't complain to the library attendant about us being too loud. She complained after you grabbed her highlighter off the table to stir vodka into your tumbler with.
HOW AM I SUPPOSED TO BE A DRUNK WHEN ALL MY ENABLERS ARE BUSY?!
I am going to paint butt plugs like little Christmas trees and give them as gifts.
You could paint cock rings as wreaths.
We are gonna have a bake sale and the preceded will go towards the abortion
I almost wrecked my car because of a guy in skinny jeans had a boner
Idk... I'm not sure why anyone would use a flesh light in general. Let alone hook it up to a wifi device.
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