I got into an eating contest with Christina. I ate 6 oranges.
Why? Who won?
we don't know. we ran out of oranges.
morning outfit: hottub soaked skirt. no underwear. someone's bandanna worn as a shirt. took me an hour to walk home. this isn't fun anymore.
just came on the shower curtain. sorry housekeeping.
Plus apparently whenever one of her friends loses their virginity they get a party with a funfetti cake which I found funny
so high and i think i just ordered a magic bullet.
did you call within the first 18 minutes? can i have the free one?
No its cool, because I bought a handle of tequila earlier, in case things went south
In hindsight, the torn ligament in my knee is probably the fault of the ginbucket and jager bombs starting at 3pm. I guess I'll stop blaming it on you.
im trying to stop thinking of him and his amazing dick. every time i do i snap myself with a rubber band. classical conditioning at its finest...and you said i wouldnt learn anything from psychology.
I can't believe that 100lb chick tackled me through a flight of stairs
Did you just send me an ass picture with a quote from the lion king?
What are you gonna do about it?
My parents heard us going at it in their tent. I told my mom it must have been a bear looking for food. I don't think she bought it. She deliberately chose this park because bears haven't been sighted here in years.
If you get me a sex toy for Christmas everyone in my family will question our relationship.
I'm a girl who met my last three bfs in gay clubs. Think I'm doing something wrong?
Lunch date was a success. And you'll be proud- my legs stayed closed.
He stopped the gas pump at 69 and gave me my receipt. He wants it.
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