living well may be the best revenge, but it doesn't hurt that my exhusband is now dating a BEAST.
the last 2 times weve had drunk sex ive had to get the morning after pill.. he's turning into a real expensive fuck buddy.
This girl has a second refrigerator that she uses JUST for liquor, her kitchen chairs are kegs AND she can grill. I'm not coming back.
You were making dinosaur noises while jerking me off..
I've done unspeakable things to your penis. I have every right to give it a name.
I feel like he knows I had a dream about him eating me out in the janitors closet at the holiday party. He's giving me THAT look.
I thought you should know that there is a scientific law stating that when there is booze, people talk about your dick.
its amazing there are so many photos of me and him separately, since most of that party time was spent sneaking away to fuck upstairs...
I also slapped not one but two bananas on the ass, twerked in public, and I think I made out with someone
He took a picture of me to show his boss why he was late...Is that a compliment or not?
We are not having sex in the fucking kindergarten
Dude. I keep thinking about how I let a man gum my vagina.
NO FUCKBOY SHALL PASS OPERATION #BITCHMODE HAS SUCCEEDED
honestly performing my own hysterectomy would hurt less than my cramps right now.
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