i think i may have caused an international incident at the french embassy, just fyi
hahaha how?
its a long story involving a horse trailer and some shrubbery
I can always tell its time to do laundry when my vibrator doesn't stay covered up in my sock drawer.
he seriously made his penis a facebook.
i swear, about 40% of my drunken life is spent having sex with him.
Your expertise in crazy bitches is needed.
His fuck buddy just got fake tits and wants him to 'come break them in.' I need his life.
I thought you just gave him blowjobs and he criticized your drug use.
According to this USDA thing I just read, I should either get upper respiratory issues or begin to bleed from my nose and mouth.
Someone had written "Boxmonsterette" on the bathroom wall and I just knew you'd been here.
My dog got laid yesterday. Some lady came over with her husky to breed. He did it like a champ. I was so proud
you can't tell me not to come to work cause roads are bad then ask me an hour later to come in and expect me to be sober
Update - might be back in your neighbor's good graces. She liked the framed photo I gave her of me on the tractor with my business out.
I remember the Prince Albert and the three penises in the threesome. But the rest no.
Also my roomates are going to be gone till sunday. Make correct decision here
Quit calling your parents your roomates
Not having a reliable dick in is getting expensive. I’ve had to replace 3 vibrators since Mike and I split up
Randomize
