Don't cheat on me with the blonde bimbo religi freak
I wouldn't touch her with a ten foot pole
She's blonde
Do you still have your period?
Best walk of shame ever - Brown Hennesy shirt, bright blue overly large basketball shorts, stilettos from night before - ended up buying a ton of 40's and a 30 pack of coors.
Where are you?
A place I should not be.
Guys are so much hotter at OU. Come my mating season, I am flying south like the geese in the wintertime.
my love horoscope just told me to "say it in frosting" should i take this literally?? i think yes.
i just carried on a conversation with my mother from another room mid-ejaculation. you would have done the same
i was the DD for the swedish students tonight. Got paid 23 dollars for driving 10 miles. gotta love ignorance and the confusion conversion brings.
A few things for you to consider: 1. Drunk enough that I'm looking up the dictionary definition of Wish. 2. Dictionary.com has new features. 3. Windows is offering me 500 business cards for 5 bucks. 4. I've always wanted a card that says I'm a ninja
ok, she started talking about how she swears her step dad killed her mom. starting to back out of this one
It was ths the worst 15 minutes of my life. . . It was like fucking a warm stick of butter.
So much to do, haven't done anything except hook up with sailors and work on my tan.
Oh my god. That was the best half-hour of my life that didn't involve genitals.
Just told my shrink " this was a year for whoring around"
The fact that I am laying in bed on my stomach with an ice pack on my rump is a clear indication that I am no longer in my carefree 20s
Puking in the Ritz Carlton bathroom was actually kind of a nice experience
Randomize