I've been thinking about all the girls in my life in terms of applying to college.
Huh?
I guess what im trying to say is that your my safety school.
just won a stolen shopping cart in a dance off in a parking lot.
I told a kindergarten student that candy canes are bones of reject elves.
i'm transferring to degrassi. i don't care that it's severely canadian. classes are five minutes long, there's no actual work and you can get oot of class whenever you want to go have a dramatic scene with someone in the hall
literally every day that goes by where he doesn't talk to me makes me more determined to get him to have sex with me
We had sex on a ferris wheel in canada, our relationship will never be the same
long story short: there's a file in the master file cabinet labeled "lube".
No, not at all. Pulling a condom out of your vag at 2pm is NOTHING like finding $10 in your winter coat. Stop trying to make me feel better.
I'm not saying Tijuana was a bad idea, I'm saying that we make poor life choices. And Steve was robbed by the police.
Yep. My memoirs will be called "A Slore Worth Mentioning"
So "I hate myself Mondays" has extended to Tuesday this week. I just had peanut butter and a glass of wine for lunch.
Well, if worst comes to worst, I have pictures of his penis that I can put on the internet
Also, totally got laid in my yellow rubber boots and it was awesome.
Nothing says Happy Thanksgiving like picking cocaine boogers out of your nose at your parents house.
I think drunk me saved him in my phone as "beautiful man" to play a joke on sober me
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