The last thing I remeber was convincing you to hide in the fridge, and then taking everything out and you not fitting.
I threw up under water while wearing a hockey helmet last night. Awesome.
Why the hell does jager make you get to the point of having to army crawl around cause you cant feel your legs and scream jaga bombs when puking??
She goes outside, smokes 2 cigarettes, and insists on walking up the 7 flights of stairs so that her heart stays in shape. this woman is crazy.
This guy in church just had a prayer request to help him get through his hangover. He is my new hero.
Dude so coolest charity idea ever, think aids walk but instead of miles you drink beers oh the possibilities
Guys with integrity exist just to rain on my slut parade.
No. I think its because I really and truly know that he is a moron and his future prospects are zoo animals.
I don't think people appreciate how hard it is to fuck in a portapotty. Sarah and I had train for that shit.
you walked onto the street in the middle of the 10K in your thong. it was a whole new kind of expirience.
Lost feeling in my face, my shoe and had a nose bleed. That's not wings. Fuck red bull.
Oh boy I hope we come out of this alive. And with clean prison records
I need to pull it together. I just cried my eyes out to Master Chef Junior.
A girl just invited me over for a blowjob and beer. Is this a trap?
I hope you know, that by sending me a cat meme back, you've entered in a cat picture battle; which never has an end in sight.
The duel has begun.
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