He better hope I dont die soon. Because I would haunt his bitch ass and cock block 24/7
it took me about 5 minutes before I knew it was in her ass. i thought the first time would be a bit more special
I told him he was my first gentile. He was so flattered.
I'm on strict orders from her to keep sleeping with you until you give her a job next summer.
Hne relally is a cite oerfect gome. Nes awddddddddooooome.
His response today determines what state my vagina will be in this weekend.
Walked in the bathroom at work and my boss was taking a shit with the stall wide open and responded "oh yeah, I forgot you never have been to prison "
woke up to a family dragging me under their beach umbrella, they poured water on me bc they "thought I was dead" then fed me quesadillas and nursed me back to health... gotta love Cabo
When have we listened to the rational side of either of us?!
Can we just talk about how the only thing I have on my camera from this weekend is a video of you putting your whole fist in your mouth hahahha
I believe you would have been proud of me last night.. I was chasin Fireball shots with Jack and Coke. Guess there's a reason they call me Whiskey Woman.
I am a figure skater. You should know better than to let me get drunk near any patches of ice during Olympics season.
If waking up at 6 50 pm every day and getting invited to go have sex as you wake up is what alcoholism is like I can get use to this.
I'm pretty sure i doubled the number of dicks I've ever touched, last night.
I don't want them thinking I'm like, "Mm, yeah, kitchenware in my ass please."
Randomize
