how was that guy you hooked up with?
i used to think blowing a .05 was a good thing
Say something about gay babies.
why the FUCK would i wear makeup on my vagina!?
know what turns me on? long, stringy hair on a pasty looking girl with an overstuffed backpack and kneepads over her jeans in case she falls off her scooter
your less of a man for seeing that
bro...we were banging on her floor and her dog walked in and started licking my balls
Lesson Learned this Week... If it seems too good to be true he is probably just trying to get you pregnant.
Dude, didnt you only know that guy for a month and he is demanding offspring?
Apparently, at this age my womb is an early conversation
But it was well worth it to see a man fly through the air in a beaver costume...
How did you get the entire couch up on it's side and into the bathroom?
im getting coffee to go get coffee.
Im throwing up in my trash can so I can go throw up in the toilet. We're basically on the same level.
the two person party stopped when i realized that he tried to throw a hammer at my head.
The guy at the ER said it was the first time he's given stitches for a funneling accident. Then he seemed upset that I took pride in that...
I'm just opting for alcohol abuse, ramen and cuddling with my dog for now.
literally 50% of my time being 20 has involved my genitals thus far
I know how vodka works Grace. I'm drunk, not stupid.
the worst fight me and my gf ever had was over Guy fieri
Randomize
