you started puking right when a nickelback song came on..it was epic
Nothing says fuck you quite like putting your used condom in someones mailbox for them to find in the morning.
We got them high and they had an hour long debate on the best way to get cum out of eyes.
you better fuck at least one or both of them.
Ive been sitting around naked watching magic on youtube.
she insisted that i refer to her boobs by name.
He just showed me a video of his erect penis moving to the beet of the music when he was high, I think I'm in love.
her best friend is in town and she told me that they used to fool around when they were drunk and I'd have to "help keep that from happening"
you motherfucker
From the guy that lifted you into a fan I'm sorry
So far, my day has been sparkling with the tears of a thousand rainbow unicorns. I'd say this is quality shit you've grown.
No she left bc the of pic I have of my mom in my bathroom. She thought it was my gf
Why the hell do you have a picture of YOUR MOM in your bathroom?!?!
Withdrawals are gods way of saying "you're still my bitch"
Why am I feeling up grandma?!
I'm really glad a picture of you as an infant followed this text.
You were definitely drunk. You gave him an otphj in front of everyone.
I hear jingle bells and I can't tell if it's bc I'm feeling festive or just REALLY high
I remember walking into a bathroom stall that had a couple fucking in it and giving them a condom and a thumbs up and then leaving
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