I just put lube in Matt's bellybutton. He looks unhappy.
Apparently he doesn't remember leaving the bar
If I spent $100 at the bar and didn't get laid I wouldn't want to remember anything either
Yes but life is bad with poopy sheets
Do you think girls in gamma phi sit around and think about how much they suck?
i dont understand blimps. what would happen if they collided would they just bounce off or fall to the ground.
dude how high are you right now?
do you think jeeves would know? you do it. ask jeeves.
Don't tell me wow. Tell me this is normal for college and in no way am I a whore.
They figured our he was high when he told the manager he wanted a break to go wrap his dick in toliet paper and pretend it was a ghost.
HES DOING PULLUPS BE STILL MY BEATING HEART
jesus, I think that canada gold metal game has completely changed all rules of acceptable drinking habits, I was fucked untill noon and I just got invited to go party when I get off work...at 600am...and NO ONE understood why i was hesitant
A man can only lie in bed watching COPS for so long before he wants to do things that can lead him to starring on the show.
I feel like I hate him but his dick too bomb to hate completely
Everybody posting sickening holiday couple pics and I'm over here deepthroating a bottle of whiskey.
I just found a samari sword in the couch. I'm about to take like 5 shots and pretend to be captain jack sparrow
Idk I saw a cheetah print onesie and it reminded me of your Lion King fantasy.
i hooked up with all four beatles on halloween get on my level
Randomize
