Taking a 35 year old indonesian home, only in vegas ;-)
Seriously though, we're going to drink and watch Survivor first one to puke gets voted off the island
i walked into the party and i guess everyone knew because they began to chant "ass to mouth"
I wonder if those guys know that i know that is a halfway house and dont just think it is some cool older guy frat house.
My mom just found some of our lube mixed in with my box of pots and pans. I hate moving home.
He's slept with 25.5 people. Wtf is a half?
He said "ride me pocahontas" while I was on top of him last night
You were yelling in my ear let's double team her with her right next to us
also bought condoms to give away to people who look like they're about to make a bad halloween decision. I'm like a fairy.
He said to use 30 racks as chairs and then drink til we fall thru the box
Well despite the fact that I'm still not entirely sure this isn't an elaborate/cunning plan to kill me, I'm in.
I don't know what I'm more pleased with, the blowie last night or that fact that there's still 20 dollars in my wallet
New fuck buddy and long time fuck buddy are carpooling home for thanksgiving. #10hrconvoaboutmyblowjobskills
Yeah, reverse cow girl. She was on top and I was playing Flappy Bird behind her back. Easiest way to have angry sex.
There are regrets.. and there are RAGRETS
Randomize
