his mom walked in, looked at me, sighed n nsaid 'when are u gonna learn' n walked out
You see.... Im at the point in my life where pissing in a toilet is a luxury for me
Chapter 6 - how to lose your underwear in chicago
Home. Hour long discussion with mom. Very frightened. Eating a sausage. Don't remember making it. Confused.
Finals are done.. I just wanna get drunk and pretend I'm a seahorse.
I was expecting a blowjob when she shoved me in the bathroom but instead she shaved my pubes into a mustache for my penis. I am still satisfied.
Post a pic on facebook and see if those same 46 girls find shitting in the bed handsome and adorable
I don't care how fucking drunk you are, you don't forget wanting to shove a wine bottle up someone's ass.
Would it be a good deed to leave a 32 pack of bud light next to a bum sleeping in the park?
All I know is that I woke up with my pajamas on inside out in front of a bowl of watered down kd. Sitting up. I didn't even make it to bed.
I couldn't do it. You can't break up after that many orgasms. It's physically impossible.
My fridge door just caught on fire somehow.
Remember that guy I fucked last month? Well I'm watching his dog this weekend while he's in the Bahamas with his girlfriend. What is my life
you know your booty call is really trying when he offers to pay the toll for the bridge you have to cross to get to his house
Hey I had a great night last night but I don't want to lie to you I'm only 19 and that wasn't my place its was my cousin he's gone for the summer and I was just house sitting and watching his cat I'm sorry
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