kill, fuck, marry: alice cullen, hermione granger, ginny weasley.
damn... fuck alice for sure, I feel bad but i think I have to say marry ginny... and kill hermoine! I can't believe I'm answering this right now.
new low.... made out with someone while peeing
He wanted a quickie. I said, can I play doodle jump on my iPhone during? And that's exactly how it went.
Two girls are now jumping in the ocean naked at 10 PM...and I was just starting to hate Ocean City
you insisted on breathalizing me with a inhaler.
But it was well worth it to see a man fly through the air in a beaver costume...
No, absolutely not. If you see that cunt, throw confetti or eggs at her.
That's a pretty extreme jump from confetti to eggs
He brought her home and fucked her in a gingerbread man costume in a cardboard rapunzel castle. He had a pretty good night.
Im glad the only reason we got out of bed today was to get Halloween candy on sale.
if you arent using your penis to save lives, then what good is it?
Guy pissing in the corner in downtown Boston as his girlfriend is covering him up, yelling "relationship goals"
I just walked by a dude at the gym covering himself in olive oil.
You wouldn't put pants on to see my parents.
Do you think it's a bad sign of the outcome of the pregnancy test I'm about to take that I was eating a fudgsicle on the way into the drugstore? Would it make worse to tell you I also bought a big ass bag of Cornnuts?
Played Gay Bar on the jukebox and pissed off the Republicans here. Best day before birthday ever.
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