She was adopted and used to dance at Sapphire. just my speed.
sometimes when i'm drunk i choose the spanish option on the ATM to challenge myself.
I put bits of fruit cocktail in the jello shots i made because i knew that they were gonna be the only thing we ate all day
how was ur day?
this is strictly sexting don't make small talk.
She grabbed both of our dicks in the pool then said repeatedly, "this is my dream, this is my dream,"
Just told my mom sparks is a health drink. Officially getting hammered on the way to the beach.
Europe's "the final countdown" was playing. It was pretty much amnesty for anything that might happen the rest of the night. It's a rule.
And then he tried to clean the throw up off my pants with 409
you tried to fill your inhaler with vodka
Nothing like moscato in your sinuses tobmake your night complete
I still have way too many Frat houses to get blackout drunk at before I'm get in any type of relationship
No offense, I mean I'm sure you rocked my world and all but I don't remember.
I'm not saying you did or didn't sleep with him but he's has your thong hanging from his ceiling fan
oh god I've lost the ability to distinguish between 'star trek' and 'the future'
If you can wrestle my underwear off of me, you can top. It'll be like using an amulet in Legends of the Hidden Temple. Instead of not getting captured, you don't get fucked in the ass.
Randomize
