they just started talking about wanting to bang stephanie tanner from full house
Ironically her ferret's toys look like her sex toys.....this is a whole new level of kinky for me
The only thing that made me get out of bed this morning was knowing that tonight, I don't plan on remembering what happened today
OH YEAH AND FORGOT TO THANK YOU FOR THE lack of WARNING THAT HE WASN'T CIRCUMSIZED.
gave him road head on the way to his grandparents house. purposely didn't let him finish, the sexual tension over turkey was indescribable.
2012 needs to end already. I've exceeded my quota for People Who Have Accidentally Seen My Tits.
I swear to god little potato creatures live inside Belvedere bottles and claw at your throat as you swallow shots.
Tuesday Boozeday turned into What-the-fuck-were-you-thinking Wednesday real fast.
I'm studying. And by studying I mean I am laying on my floor drinking boones farm alone. Last two weeks. Fuck it.
Well I smoked some weird shit and I think I peed on my phone.
My dad is blowing up my phone with pictures from the midget wrestling match.
Smoking a bowl and ordering Dominos, you want in on either, both, or none?
I just ate a handful of salt
I thought this was a good idea
What do you bring to an "I'm getting divorced party?"
.......Shattered dreams and tequila?
Love waking up to a new contact named “Pizza” btw
Randomize
