She's in the bathroom crying cuz she can't get the condom out of her giner. Do you have tongs?
I just drove by a church. On the sign out front was written 'crocodile cock'. On both sides.
It was odd. His friends dick tasted the same as his. Friends are beginning to have to much in common
Why is your signature on my underwear?
who has not yet felt my sugrcially enhanced boobs. HurryI am at the bnar and it is 1:15 am
Actually, considering the facts that I am wearing a duct tape dress and eating a gas station quesadilla, I am pretty good.
Experimentation with dessert toppings followed by shower sex. Only logical progression bro.
The last thing I remember was paying off her younger brother not to judge me, then puking on his shoes.
I just dropped $300 on lingerie. He better rip this off with his teeth.
apparently, dueling with garden tools in Home Depot is strictly frowned upon
Vodka and Jamison is not a mixed drink
I asked him if we were going to get arrested for doing it in the bar parking lot. "Absolutly not" said the guy getting the blow job...
You ever feel like just rubbing your face in everything like a dog?
Who says no to sex and donuts?!
We hotboxed his bathroom. going to be a good night
Hotbox went wrong - smoke sets off fire alarm. Firefighters coming
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