so i just calculated it and i would need to score 150% on this final to pass
Chipotle...archenemy of the gay man. Cockblocking me since 1997
bikini waxes are so much more painful when you know you're not getting laid
I DON'T CARE WHAT THE CIRCUMSTANCES ARE NEVER VOMIT IN MY PURSE AGAIN.
He woke me up at 4am just to lick my nipple. Then he talked in his sleep for 20 minutes about the sex we just had. I think it's safe to say he's a weird one, but I dont care cuz he fucks like a champ.
I would feel bad that's he's locked out naked, but the world should really see that.
well, I yelled "the tribe has spoken!" at a boatload of people and then I walked home alone in the pouring rain at 1:30am. karma really is a bitch, yo.
What's great about college is that i can eat chocolate cereal for every meal and call it a money saving technique.
Also can you rate on a scale of zero to jesus restraining order christ how creepy it is that he found a porn star that looks like me and has watched all the porn that she's been in
So my roommate and I have a written agreement stating that if he tries to sleep with his ex girlfriend, I have to immediately intervene and nut punch him then send her on her way.
this is the most serious roommate agreement ever
I think the "tmi" ship sailed a long time ago, and it took our dignities with it..
I just hope I don't wheeze during sex
I'm happy I peed in your laundry basket last night
Do you really want to know anything about the inner machinations of a furry's mind
In this house, we have but one simple rule: DONT FUCKIN TOUCH MY STUFF OR I'LL CUT YOUR NECK IN UR SLEEP
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