Picture Ja Rule and 50 Cent having a sexy full grown love child son...He's on my bus right now, wearing an outside jacket with no shirt underneath. My fashion sense and libido are fighting it out.I'll keep you posted on who wins.
I know we didn't hook up because i was still wearing my fanny pack in the morning
he said no girl had ever swallowed his cum before
he probably also told you he thought u were pretty
As your boss, I feel obligated to tell you that turning our management meeting into a kegger may just be the best idea you've given me yet.
Fell asleep on the Grass at Lolla woke up in the Brown line. What. The. Fuck.
just had a very awkward conversation with the concierge at the hotel, they threw your underwear out
Actually let's just focus our energy on not getting committed to a psych ward.
Guys always stop talking to me right around the point that if they bought me food a couple times I would probably have sex with them.
Twice. I only peed my pants twice tonight.
You know you're doing college wrong when you have to bail your RA out of jail
I'm excited for you as you venture towards new drug experiences
I have a guy for practically everything... except for making me waffles on demand. will u be my waffle guy?
Am I supposed to get so horny by looking at your dick that I start orgasming uncontrollably
1 why did you tell them where i peed last night and 2 where the fuck are you
try to milk me bitch
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