I just had human shit waiting for me at the top of the escalator at Bowery. This is truly the Lord's day.
May the Lord look upon you in favor and give you pees.
Don't go all Obama on me. George Bush this decision and just do it. Thinking's for the morning after
I just accidently tagged myself in the picture of the 16 year olds spreading their legs in bikinis. Failure.
i just assumed he broke up with her because she wasn't a freshman anymore
New moon trailer came on. Theater booed. I love these people.
Hippo gnu deer
Btw, just wanna point out that you've hooked up with two guys whose birthdays are today. Congratulations, you have a type!
The way I'm gonna look at it is, if you don't makeout with your roommate once in college, you didn't do something right.
Ya well here is the deal with last night, it was the Biggest shit show we have ever co-stared in.
Just successfully made home fries from potatoes we used as bowls while stoned as shit. I deserve a trophy.
Matt says that there are strip club auditions in our living room and he'd like you to audition.
I just put on my phone calendar to remind me of my final child support payment in 2029
It’s only loud for those who wanna get loud. The bowlers are protected.
Got baked and laid and ate baked lays when I laid down while baking the brownies I I’m Superman
You’re still high, aren’t you?
Oh yeah
I’ve chosen to watch a Mercedes station wagon drive around the Austrian in the rain because it’s live sports. If that doesn’t explain 2020, I don’t know what does.
Randomize
