no more hot dogs for you........
fine no more vajj for you
I'm done. I'm tired and there's a topless pic of me floating around the nation's largest 3G network.
it was such a weird mix, KFC and penis
Decided against hooking up with creepy stalker guy for a ride to work. I feel I've earned a few self respect points back.
Man, I must say, having known you since preschool, Eiffel-Tower-ing her would've fully completed our journey to brotherhood.
God, for the last time, no I did not break my nose doing a keg-stand just for a nose job.
I asked if he wanted to sext and he just started sending me pictures of his beard.
I woke up sandwiched between them, all of us naked, and they were just sharing a cigarette, a donut, and the paper like it was just some normal post-threesome Sunday brunch.
And my nipple is sore from him biting it. That is not a complaint.
Dude at one point I lost you only to find you sitting in the bushes eating pizza.
Help me help you realize you are a moron
He asked me how many starwars references he could make before i no longer find him attractive.
I'll start working on my manners when you stop using please and thank you in the bedroom.
I had a good weekend too...although I cried about the dog in a drunken stupor last night...not one of my finest moments, but it's all water under the bridge.
Not going to lie, when I looked in the tub I expected to see what might have been remnants of a squirrel.
Randomize
