I told a kindergarten student that candy canes are bones of reject elves.
How long after st. Patrick's day is it ok to shit green before I should seek medicial attention?
i wish i was a boy too so i knew what a blow job felt like
that's almost as bad as that time i almost ashed in a baby carriage
We need to talk about our relationship.
I just won a bet involving 10 tequila shots. You've got about 3 minutes
I am actually insulted by the long string of ugly, fat girls he hooked up with after me.
That's so unfortunate for him bc you can always find another penis, but he's stuck with it
Come outside. The vendor wants to go out strong tonight! Russian hooker interviews. Don't ask. We leave in 3 minutes.
Second wave of rafting ended in a concussion. Don't worry though, the paramedic says it's still not considered a DUI.
You screamed "There's a potato in my anus" and proceeded to attempt to grind with the bouncer. Also, I'm pretty sure our Chem teacher was in the same bar as us.
So apparently blacked out me judges a man based on what type of dinosaur he would be...
I think now I understand why people say my penis is pretty.
That's why you bone lesbian cage fighters and 45 year olds. To make life less boring.
somehow I wound up on the floor crying about his beard. then telling everyone I'd give him a "lesbian blowjob".
If you find out what that means, show me.
boys just don't understand what they're missing out on.
he's missing out on my boobs looking marvelous this evening.
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