He introduced her to the DMA meeting by saying: in the past few years i've never seen someone work so hard for so little success
her teeth looked like a whores toenails, i was too horrified to
She walked in the room and sighed really loudly fishing for attention. but I didn't bite cuz I don't give a fuck what's wrong with her.
Sad Moment: I only had enough $ at 711 to buy chips or salsa. I chose salsa and took a plastic spoon
i dont know you, but i just did a line with your business card.
it was a sick party until you insisted on putting on "that's how I beat shaq"
I crashed her parents' car cause she was giving me road head. Its probably best to just let them think I'm a bad driver.
Ps if we're still living vicariously through each other, you had sex on a beach last night
Do you think a former stripper/heroin addict constitutes as a high risk sexual partner?
I'm so confused. I feel like I just intentionally took roofies to see where I'd end up.
Februarys looking very promising in the vaginal department
She complimented my boobs and then told me I smelled like teddy bears before falling asleep on the floor.
Getting dome in the backseat of a friends car with Ariana Grande playing in the background was probably the most romantic part of my night
I just found an old slice of LIME in my wallet?????????
I don't know what kind of bucket list you have, but having sex with a tree isn't on mine...
Randomize
