when she was cumming she looked like terri schiavo. it took all of my memorized porn images to not go limp.
I just realized i masturbated to the home shopping network. I either need to get a boyfriend asap, or a subscription to a porn website, or i just need to stop taking ambien
she is medically diagnosed as a nympho. she has the paper to prove it. hell. fucking. yeah.
Birthday was great, I got entirely too drunk and made really poor life decisions. It was everything a birthday should be.
The girl that works the front desk at my gym invited me and my friend to come see her Tuesday during her shift at hooters because its her birthday. I still have a boner
Cleaning my pipe and using the left over resin solution to make THC laced rolling papers and a jar of hash oil/honey for my tea
WE USE THE WHOLE BUFFALO
Watermelon juice. Makes everything better. Gin. Wine. EVERYTHING.
You started crawling towards a moving train. Maybe you should take it easy next time
i feel like ive seen the light, but not in the nasty christian way. thats gross. say no to jesus, kids
he's 22 and listens to dad music. if i hear one more modest mouse song i'll never blow him again
Mom saw my dick pic over my gf's shoulder. She told her she really should've had me circumcised.
Heading there now. Already have a boner.
I was so drunk, he put me to bed and went down stairs to hang out with his friends. Apparently, I was curled up in the closet, spooning the dresser when he came back up.
Dennis picked up a 50 year old woman. Then he and Dan got in a fight and jumped out of the limo. No one knows what happened to them.
Hey long story short Grandma needs bail money.
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