Can you still call it a wet dream if sandwiches were involved?
and I'm going to name my autobiography "blow jobs with enthusiasm are the best"
I'm naming my autobiography "Reasons Not to Date Girls From Texas."
he came up my nose again i swear he does this just to piss me off
He dumped me and I don't wanna fuck his best friend for revenge. Is this what maturity feels like?
WHATEVER CLASS IS PLAYING "TOOT IT AND BOOT IT" AT 8:30 IN THE MORNING, I WANT IN.
I just got peed on. This karma circle is starting to get vicious.
Ive never seen one person more proud of themselves of peeing in public and getting away with it.
i found you in bed eating fish fillets dipped in chocolate pudding
omg his dad is hot
... I'm currently away at the moment. Leave a msg since I cannot express how much I can't help you stop ruining peoples lives.
I think you just miss his friendship.
I think it's his ability to give me multiple orgasms.
A stoners worse nightmare? Well packaged snacks. Just took me 5 mins to get a cinnamon roll out of the package. And another 3 mins to properly type this text
SShout out to Barney the Dinosaur for teaching me how to sing the ABCs backward. I just scored a free pitcher.
She looked so much better when u didn't look at her and the music was too loud to hear her
Correction: *I* watched JoJo's Bizarre adventure while he snored asleep on me cock still fully inside me.
I told him to take his man panties off and take the fucking Jaeger bomb already, so no to a 2nd date
Randomize
