i'm in his phone as sushi coochie
"I could never have "feelings" for someone who, at one point, wanted to "hate fuck" my face."
well as my mentor always said, "Don't antagonize the man whose penis gives you multiple orgasms."
His foreplay reminded me too much of breastfeeding.
She greeted me with a new giants jersey and an opening day blowjob. this is true love.
When the cop tells you to leave the pool, does that mean you have to put your bathing suit back on too?
Just remember, Dont make worse choices than american flag pants to your own birthday party
Remember that time a drunk Dracula took a shit in the urinal? Ooh, that's right, it was last night.
Have I showed you the picture of my vagina with a little bang flag coming out of it?
Can you get snapchat back so I can show you all the places I threw up in/on last night?
I don't remember anything but bad decisions last night
His eyefucking isn't even normal eyefucking; it's eye anal.
Drug test isn't today. Now I'm just sitting in this orientation with a bag of your piss in my pants
By the way, you totally deserve "i got a job sex".
That's the only way to watch Gumby. Either age 5 or high.
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