They should make Glad Forceflex condoms.
it was really bad. he went around saying "I want you inside of me" to everyone.
I think its only fitting my first purchase with my student loan is a glass pipe? I think ill name it 'Subsidized'
You better drive. If I decide to let them talk me into a 3-way, I don't want you to be stranded.
I'll just get wasted and start throwing myself at men. Someone's bound to take the bait
So then she just shoved applesauces in her pocket and started talking about she needed to find her friends.
you didn't get her number why?
Your excessive judging is making this uncomfortable
SARAH B AND I ARE GOING TO GO HALFSIES AND BUY YOU A CAT. IS THAT OKAY. TO KEEP YOU COMPANY DURING THUNDERSTORMS SUCH AS THIS ONE. ITS BECAUSE WE LOVE YOU.
I have a meeting at work in an hour, I'm so hungover going outside is NOT happening there are roads and shit I'll totally get myself killed.
Ideas for halloween. We need simple yet hilarious. Cheap yet effective. Slutty yet acceptable. Go.
I also just told a guy I was available for counseling in case he needed to 'bang' things out. I've become a monster.
I'd do them all but honestly I'm so high that I probably should have a chaperone.
you don't go into accounting for the pussy....
I texted him back and I am so nervous I may vomit up all of the soup I just ate.
Ya i'm marrying the man who can hear/smell this level of flatulence and stick around
Randomize
