Just woke up naked in my storage cubby and some one rearragned my whole room?
no jk, not my room
last night i used 411 to try and contact britney spears.
dollar well spent
Take xtc, wait 20 minutes and then take a shower. Trust me.
pube in her braces AGAIN. barely kept a straight face.
Why is there 6 cases of kwic trip dounuts dumped in my bed? Best 34 dollar wake up of my life
my quiz for the book was only 2 questions and my one answer was sorry and then a sad face
I need to stop drinking. Side note- we have a party bus tonight. So the drinking will have to end after that
It's sad that the best source of heat that I have is my vaporizer.
In fact, not a good idea to go into any house alone after a man invites you in from his balcony.
Don't look him in the eyes, it like looking at the sun but instead of burning your retinas it makes you wet and vulnerable
She just rubbed her face up and down my six pack cooing. Equal measure of weird and hot.
I'm still pretty stoned. There are mini rice cakes in my robe pocket to snack on in the shower.
I had to say goodbye to one of my fuck buddies last night. He's voting for Trump, we shouldn't be doing it anyways.
I'm not just straddling the line between love and hate, I'm dry humping the shit out of it
I’m not sure she knows my name. She introduced me as “the fuck toy”
Randomize
