My brain says no but my pants say off.
i think i just witnessed the elusive male walk of shame
We need to start having rules for the weekends. Like no more downing 3 shots because we want to slut dance a little harder or because biggie just came on.
They call it the Collection Couch because all 4 room mates have slept with at least 3 different girls on it. He tried to seal the deal with "would you like to be number 14?"
And sadly I did.
I may have been hammered and in a wheelchair but I definitely remember asking the hospital reseptionist to marry me
She's been divorced three times and use to raise cock fighters. Of course I'm interested in her
Seriously man, I'm worried that my dick's going to fall off someday if I keep this up...
found a ham sandwich in the elevator it tasted so hungry and it was still fresh. dont be mad at me. you know you love ham.
You ever got drunk on $5? Cuz it's about to happen
I'm considering having a threesome with my friend just so I can sleep with his boyfriend and not feel guilty about it.
Is "I am going to murder you if you keep sending me requests that I cannot fulfill" unprofesh?
Personally, if my roommate had a nice friend who made me dinner, gave me free beer, a 4am meal, a couch to sleep on in an apartment on the beach, and breakfast when I woke up, and I found out that said roommate was fucking her, I'd be all... right on! She's cool! Thanks for the quesadillas!
My 12 o'clock class is an all star team of my ex's hook ups
Like the friend zone has no room for winks
You're the only guy I know who could convince a lady at the pharmacy to trade you her pain pills for your antibiotics.
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