I figured girls wouldn't be down to sleep w/ a guy who plugged a pregnant chick
you were calling yourself Ulickes S. Cunt.
I guess she didn't feel like it. There was hair all over it and everything
you thought your tounge was "malfunctioning" because every time u spoke it wouldnt sit still.
She was singing my heart will go on into her barf bag. celine aint got shit on her.
when i tried to put the condom on he started screaming about how he didn't want his groceries bagged
I was trying to chase her off the carpet, but now there are figure-eights of cat vomit. everywhere
How high are you?
I feel like breakfast can just fly into my mouth
I got high with the cantor. Rethinking this whole non-practicing Jew thing.
Also, I would just like to reiterate my apologies for tearing up in the grocery store.
hey now, it was 6 bucks for 5 shots. you would have lost your panties too.
You just want to live out all your fuck fantasies with all these girls through me. I know your game. Well played sir.
IT'S A GIANT FUCKING ROBOT, DUDE. LOGIC IS OUT OF THE QUESTION BECAUSE AWESOME.
It all started with a game of naked twister.
I would cock slap so many things if I had a cock.
Randomize
