she had the hairiest bush ive ever seen. it looked like a spoiled head of lettuce.
stephanie tanner's voice is so fucking annoying. no wonder she resorted to crystal meth.
No its cool, because I bought a handle of tequila earlier, in case things went south
You just kept yelling, "THAT'S THE POWER OF PINESOL, BABY!"
why is my new profile picture on Facebook one of me with a bunch of strangers on an elevator?
maybe these stereotypes wouldn't come up if you would stop taking body shots off another
Two hot shots of tequila for breakfast? Yeah today is gonna be a shit show
SURVIVAL MODE. WE CAN DO THIS. Celebratory survived-working-christmas-retail sex to follow
So apparently there is enough alcohol to get me to agree to going to a strip club, but when I have enough they don't let me in.
i think the realest test of our friendship is how hot your sister looks right now
He saved that picture of my boobs for good luck romance still exists
Am I supposed to get so horny by looking at your dick that I start orgasming uncontrollably
Went to bed still wearing my bralette. When I was changing this morning, a Tootsie Roll fell out. I'm definitely living my best life.
He was singing on top of spaghetti, and then started crying. He said it was the saddest song ever, "so so sad".
She flirted with a pilot and a frat boy at the airport in Vegas and told our bartender his mask matched her panties so yeah I’d say she’s rebounding from the divorce
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