Midget sex pt 2 tonight
I think it's safe to say that I made out with the entire msu campus this weekend
yeah I know. she is a stupid fat trailer trash bitchwhore and I hate her
but when she came up to me in the bar I had to be all like "OMG HEYYY how are you, I haven't seen you in foreverrrrr!!"
but for the record, yeah, I hope she gets mauled by a bear and dies
spell your last name, im trying to find you on facebook
apparently i traded the tiffany necklace my mom bought me for 2 shots and next in line for beer pong at the frat.
The homeless ppl in LA are great. Theres sum guy that makes all of his clothes out of tighty whitey underwear. He makes bags out of them 2. Presumably 2 hold more underwear.
it is entirely possible that the police will be knocking on the door in 25 minutes
I had a great penis washing session in the sink before I left. Washed off all the bar and green beer
DOWN HORMONES. BACK.
It's times like this I miss having my nipples pinched
Haha yeah that's basically it. He was like "i've always had a thing for you, and even sober i still would do and feel the same way." so glad to know i am worthy of a sober hookup as well.
Heard you had a bad day. I have vodka, chocolate and my dick here ready to put a smile back on your face.
Know what's awkward? Having a couple of moving guys watch while you detach the bondage cuffs from your bedframe, that's what.
also, sleeping with your chipotle guy sounds like a good idea until you want chipotle on your day off and have to look somewhat presentable to acquire said chipotle.
Is 28 too old to get fingered in Centennial Park? Asking for a friend.
Randomize
