you dont need to remember merediths name haha. only jane
Also, the drinking age in Japan is 20. At what point in the sky am I allowed to start downing alcohol?
I'll come out for a little. I can't be visibly hungover at work again or I get written up and fired. And yes, I am aware of how alcoholic that sounds.
you should be careful. everyone knows your chances of pregnancy increase by 100 percent when youre the daughter of a religious figure
You had me at "mimosas" several texts ago.
I can't even masturbate anymore!! That was my last source of cardio!!
I'm gonna have to get you a special blowjob bib -- like a lobster bib -- but instead of a picture of a little red lobster, it will have a picture of a penis, with 3 big squirts coming out.
I never thought it would be so hard to find a power hour partner at 2 on a Wednesday
I mean, it was a fun hookup and he's cute and whatnot, but he wouldn't go down on me. Plus he's a republican. Idk why but those things feel like they go hand in hand.
I want a shirt that says, "I'm sorry for the things I said when it was Taco Tuesday"
Enough talk of my burning loins. How is your day?
we are eating waffles in the pillow fort. Still think you're too straight for a threesome?
I'll be right over.
Why thank you for your unwanted opinion, person I've never met before.
Every time Brady gets sacked I cum a little...
You're lucky I'm holding your vagina in my best interests
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