at least franzia made me throw up pretty colors.
Being high is an amazing excuse. I was using him for the potential of a beret, come on. I'd do that sober.
It's christmas eve and my mom blacked out before me. If she beat me at that, what have I been learning at college?
So fucking hammered. Is this all spelled right? I'm holding it up to my eye. I am on a boulder. I feel like an owl
Two people confessed their love to me last night. Drunk is a good color on me
Drunk and alone at a magic show is what my life has become without you
I can't! Its just like the night that I bathed you, I didn't tell anyone.
I got slapped by a drag queen and bitten on the arm by either a random girl or a weird mouth shaped dog. Tough to tell without seeing the teeth
My brother walked up to us as we were making out and was like "hey man, go to town!" and winked
Your shirt... Was in my pants
if i ever get to the point where i am moaning when i pee, please do the honorable thing and kill me.
Why do I like him? He literally has no redeeming qualities.
All I'm saying is Europe has not been easy on my vagina.
The people at Perkins seem so judgemental. Big deal if i'm handcuffed to stripper in a star-n-stripes bikini. We still gotta eat.
It's officially "let him eat me out in a sundress with no panties" season. Needless to say the first date was a success.
Randomize