help me. he won't leave me alone. he just licked my ear and he's so drunk. get him off me. we're in the closet. help.
I'll bet she douches with gravy.
I don't think brook has ever known best
Do u think I can claim pregnancy as an accident so my insurance covers it?
everything was going good until you started showing off the pictures of poop you took with your phone
Just remembered to take my BC at the liquor store. Just swallowed it with a free sample of Whiskey.
I kinda wish he had even a slight idea of the sex I'm planning for his departure. I'm literally studying for it.
i really care about you, respect you, another gay word, and another gay word... lets just drink
he left his wallet here so lets treat ourselves to a lunch for the lack of penis we both had deal with
Alive.
So much puke
Just thinking about this summer makes me feel a slight tingle of an orgasm mixed with a twinge of regret as the cold ghostly feeling of multiple hangovers creep into my body.
I just gate-crahed a party and met a state senator, so I had an interesting afternoon jog.
you told me your favorite colors were "pink" "no pants" and "Mexican food"
so i realized that he's only my physical relationship and beer is my emotional relationship...
We're in an alley with a psychic wizard, shes reading our palms
Randomize
