we're getting ready to take strippers to breakfast. I love my life.
I was scared of Debbie's boobs today. They were all huge and scary looking
I know I'm not learning anything when I can't even spell the name of the class I'm taking
words of advice: black light parties reveal cum stained clothing.
i made sure i dropped the whole "im a yoga teacher" bomb which basically roofies a guys sense of judgement and guarantees he will sleep with me.
what started as sign language exam pre-drinks to calm the nerves turned into me waving at a deaf woman for 20 minutes
She had her insurance card taped to her arm because it was the only thing she "couldn't take off and lose"
Then that means he's outwardly conservative. Inwardly he's a total gay horndog. He's like a spy that can ruin conservative plans.
I want to change all my life goals to that.
He laid on the ground 100 ft from the car crying about how he just wanted to be home already
But I do cardio so I don't get winded during sex really it's not like I'm trying to lose weight
You're dick is like the main character. It needs its own picture.
I feel like it could help stop wars and begin world peace and the continents can unite for one Monday because chicken fries come back today
New vibrator arrived today.
How was it?
Who are these wee mortals we call men?
Im so hungover I just threw up at the sight of a CARTOON CRABBY PATTY
We were talking about kinky shit, and I suggested a hand job in church.
How'd that go over?
Praise the lord and pass the lotion.
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