Well to be completely honest its more of a 'i wanna do things to you that your parents would not enjoy hearing about' mood
you missed a midterm to shack? WOW. How desperate are you?
i'm considering texting him with "i'm leaving the country for a year, wanna fuck?"
do it. it's every man's dream.
It's hard for me to sext him when the picture i see on my phone when he texts me is his facebook default of him and his girlfriend.
At least drunk you showered before switching sex partners last night.
They went to the hospital to try backflips in the parking lot. Be ready for the call
The only bad thing about this relationship... my forearm strength is dwindling
I seriously might throw up right now. In class. Sunglasses on. I'm getting too old for this.
Cops busted the party. A kid dressed as a dinosaur tried to crawl out the bathroom window but his tail got stuck. It took 3 cops to pry him out.
Vodka tonic time....wish me luck!
Go for it my man. I'm saving my shit show night for tomorrow. Gonna make it a big one just to let the entire bar know why I'm single
I'm just that drunk tells people I love them or wants to set them on fire. Accept that.
I found a hot kiwi last time and sucked his dick. That's what rooftop bars are made for.
Not to play devil's advocate, but, considering how our species has evolved so far... I'm kinda rooting for the sun on the whole heat death thing.
Damn victory sex feels great
He was out clubbing with his SON. WHY did you let me KISS HIM? Also WHERE WAS HIS SON?!
Randomize
