Nope, Im Irish and pissed with some drunk mixed in...therefore punching things is the best solution to every problem.
theres a middle aged lesbian couple holding hands on the bus and a 17 or 18 year old christian girl visibly staring freaked out and audibly praying about it
I don't know where your sunglasses are, I was too preoccupied with girls not old enough to drive past midnight.
...she's taking her top off and singing songs from Anastasia. I swear to God were solumates.
found your viking helmet in the parking lot this morning, its missing a horn. There was still liquor in the remaining horn. shots from a viking helmet should be mandatory.
Dude. I kneed him in the face and gave him a black eye. It's like a constant reminder of our hookup. I feel like herpes. I never go away...
Challenge: Try to have your balls hanging out in every picture you take tonight
Challenge Accepted
Bang-toberfest begins!!
Yah... You need to get here. Evan just peed off the karaoke stage.
My mom just asked me if I can obtain a fake ID by thursday
I fell asleep in the tanning bed, naked, for an hour and a half and I guess they couldn't wake me up so they called the fire department...and they came in while I was passed out naked...
Mom kept me on a leash as a kid, did you know this?
When she went in the beer store I got to hold it.
Idk I've taught my 18 month old how to say nipple so kids aren't all bad
Yeah, everything was going great until the mugging.
scotch tastings during the week is a baaad idea. i woke up w no pants but wearing my winter coat
Randomize
