Ha. No worries! So loud here &god I love drag queens! How does it happen, the congealing?
saw a pregnant woman in a bridal gown standing on the side of the road while her car was getting searched by police....cheers to new beginnings
i'm drunk and confused. there might be a 4 year old here.
Found a pic of me suckling your nipple at the bar. Safe to say you don't want this one tagged?
Just took a shot out of a used mini planter. Might die from the pesticides, but didnt want whoever took all of my shotglasses to think they won.
oh dont worry, my liver will give out way before i get skin cancer
Even the paramedic said "what a way to kill a party"
I used his computer to order the pizza and the only thing he had in his search bar was 'text NASA'
DID YOU REALLY JUST GIVE ME A FIRST BASE SIGN
Carson when you get home I want you to go downstairs and go into each bedroom and pick up the underwear and either throw it out or give it back to the people who own them. Look all over the room. Thank, Love Mom
Is it counter productive to ride on my exercise bike with a cocktail in hand?
The last time I saw her someone was carrying her on a bike and she was yelling that she was E.T.
I'm still home, my life isn't together. Currently drying my pants
Ugh, I should just give up, and fuck him in a parking lot, and shave my head and walk naked through the streets of King's Landing.
He got me off while watching hockey. He's a keeper.
Randomize