I am about to get in a knife fight over a corn dog.
she said it was ok for her to take her top off in the hot tub but she didn't take off her bottoms because that would be slutty
How can people commit suicide when things like bagels exist
There's a high school volleyball camp on campus this summer. I'm definitely going to jail.
we got hammered off table wine and i ended up biting my acrylic nail off so i could finger his butt.. ill never look at valentines day the same
Just found out they make medicinal lollipops, bought like 40 of them. Gonna go fill a pediatricians lollipop bowl.
Yes, you can 69 in a fiat. But I think I have permanent nerve damage
Well, if he didn't want to get caught mid-gay experience by his girlfriend, he shouldn't have pushed so hard to do MDMA with me.
We spent a good 10 minutes in the morning looking for my clothes. I ended up taking the bus home in my 6inch heels and his baggy t-shirt. The bus was filled with kids... one of them whistled at me.
July fourth my place, drunken bubble slip n slide. Yes this is happening and yes I am 31
Come get me we have a petting zoo to throw up in.
This is worse then when all the pharmacists sang me happy birthday while I was buying plan b
I drank a girls breast milk at this wedding. Shit was next level
I'm so sorry to hear about your grandmother. Also how many grams are in an eighth?
He had a tattoo of the Batman logo around his asshole. I noped right the hell out of there.
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