Just watched 1 guy 1 jar with my mom. Awkwardville...
I woke up in my own vomit, a chunk of cactus in my thigh, shirtless, with jons mom poking at me with a glass of dr pepper and a talk about god....damn alcohol
I just talked to a CEO of a fortune 500 company while pooping. I LOVE being self employed.
I envy the lives of milf's kids, the little kid grabs her tits and she just laughs and says not now
Her legal name is Candy. Her being a whore is implied.
We all have our weaknesses that drive us crazy. We happen to have one in common, 21 year olds. Your secrets safe. Touch his penis.
A zombie called me motorboat central while participating in an auction to motorboat my tits. he then proceeded to propose, insisting that he makes alot money.
That girl from the bar sent me a text saying that she wants to wear my cock as a hat. A cock hat. Is that good or bad?
But if you were going to pour a liquid on your naked body in fall its definitely pumpkin inspired something.
At what point did you realize I was getting blown under the table during our dominos game?
strip vodka pong is never a good idea. I saw into his colon when he picked up the ball off the floor
You had to dry your pants with the hand dryer in the bathroom because you "forgot to take it out."
And then the night went full on bisexual.
Are you done yet? I've eaten three corndogs so I'm ready 2 party.
Ur here to start shit and I'm here to light that shit on fire
Randomize
