no. you can't hotbox the world.
oh hey summer self, welcome to endless thirsty thursdays and walks of shame.
You never go ass to mouth. That's quite possibly the most important rule Paramedic school has taught me.
tell me how i ended up in the movie theater alone with a bottle of smirnoff and a bendy straw.
She was so adorably desperate I didn't have the heart to tell her I wasn't a lesbian. So now She's making waffles, may switch teams over this.
My corndog is like a popsicle of bread. A WHOLE. POPSICLE. OF BREAD.
Last thing I remember was you straddling a guy in a wheelchair on the dance floor.
Not sure if he was actually hot or hot in a "he brought a live chicken to the party" kinda way but I got his # regardless
Its not the fact that i woke up wearing a tutu that bugs me its the fact that i have 75 photos of me wearing a tutu on facebook
Are you 5:30 blackout again?
He sent me a dick pic from his living room and it has pictures of his three kids in the background
BTW, Julia referred to you as a power bottom. Are you available?
... why is there baby oil , black socks and frozen hot dogs in the sink this morning ?
Interlocking vagina powers go!!'
Oh god, your drunk again aren't you?
God knew I'd have horrible taste in men, so made me asexual to ensure I'd never fuck them.
Randomize
