we did it on the carpet and she just yells out "OH. MY PSORIASIS".
reasons why jon gosselin is probably ur biological father: 1. ur half asian 2. hes everyones biological father 3. u wear ed hardy
sounds legit
I just saw a girl walking up the hill with a little red wagon full of booze... I want to be in her study group.
Like what kind of adult things? Whats more adult than drinking at 2pm on a monday?
You better of fucked him last night or do it now because he is buying all the roommates McDonald's.
It's not like I ment to feed you the shots of vodka, my hand just kinda slipped.
We lost a condom inside me, I had to fish it out. The next day he gave me a Gone Fishin' bumper sticker. True love at its finest.
I feel so nauseous and all I want is string cheese. My life never makes sense.
Dressing as mugato from zoolander Halloween you may want to be the hand model. We can get you a fish bowl filled with Clementine Vodka and soda you can put your hand in.
Someone is giving away free yogurt on craigslist. Can I get a ride?
I even put my vibrators back in the bedroom instead of the coffee table. If that's not growing up then I don't know what is.
I got fucked in a bat mobile this morning. Being slutty rules.
I don't feel like that was meant as a compliment, but really still feels like one
Reminder to self: never have sex on a trampoline. Trampoline burn hurts worse than carpet burn.
I just recommended that the library purchase the first major hentai with tentacle porn. Really, I'm doing everyone a favor.
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