we had that weird still in bed morning after conversation. Her dad is the vp of my company.
Can you send me a pic of you vag, I'm sexting the guy and he wants a pic but I didnt shave
dude are you serious?
I know you already have a pic on your phone
dude i just heard a girl tell another girl 'what part of im trying to get laid tonight dont u understand?'
needless to say i wont be back home tonight
bio was interesting today. swabbed my mouth to see what the cells where, ha. found a sperm cell. he was just that awesome
he broke up with me while standing outside, half naked, waiting to fuck him. i feel like a leper right about now.
he convinced me that i wont have to do the walk of shame bc he has to go to jail in the morning
Hannah wants to know if she cant borrow your stats notes because she threw up on hers.
98% is good enough for me. Kinda like birth control. Worth the risk
If she makes a move, pretend to have a seizure.
All I want is tacobeell and your body
that's my favorite sentence you've ever said.
Need. Hospital. Physically am floating.
That was the first time I ever heard of a female getting road head while driving... thanks for the memory and making me happy ending..
Well my parents know I get medical Cannabis they saw me on the news at the dispensary
when i woke up w mysterious sticky crap in my hair, i assumed i had another blackout hookup. nope. turns out i made PBJ and proceeded to pass out in it. i ate the evidence when i woke up.
He told his wife he was too old to pretend to be straight. She tried to argue. He walked two tables over and was like this is my highschool sweetheart and he's an excellent fuck, we're running away together. It was epic.
Randomize
