whoever gets the blood i just donated is getting a shit ton of free thc
Job is the problem. Drinking, the solution.
Rub youre cunt and tell me you love me.
Your incorrect use of you're doesn't arouse me in the slightest.
I think I have swimmer's ear. From his tongue.
just taught 3 girls from korea how to fist pump on chat roulette.
Hey for future reference vodka can not be substituted for water when shaving your legs
3 girls crying in the bathroom at the bar. Its like a Christmas song
Just got booked to do a bachelorette party for a polygamist wedding. And notice I only text you to rub things in your face and show you my life shits on yours. Daily.
the caf people were giving us weird looks and she yelled ITS A LIFE STYLE
Oh please tell me that I'm sleeping in your shower and not the neighbor's again
some asshole was waslkibg around with ab electric razor and shaving parts of peoples heads.
They can be so fun, drunk bruises are like clues to the treasure of what actually happened last night. "why do I have a bruise on my belly button? oh right. i was trying to turn my stomach off so I would stop throwing up."
he wouldnt let me in bed until i took off all the stickers i was covered in
We need a rematch, I think my pussy was on vacation the other night.
I don't need tinder boy anymore but I do need free sushi
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