i mean i'm ok with bufu but if i'm gonna do it it needs to be a mutual agreement, and there are steps that need to be taken. you don't just go OOPS we're doing it now
i love how people use prayer to talk shit about eachother in a 'holy' manner.
He left a cum stain in the shape of a heart on my sheets.
He's like the Bob Ross of love stains.
Your roommate was biting my friend last night. It was weird.
Just ran into my ex in the WOMENS bathroom. He said I did this to him. Swore he never wore my clothes but said he liked my skirt. I need vodka.
I just won 10 dollars from out chugging the bar tender and I found out that the baby aint mine in the last hour. I don't even care if l get laid tonight any more.
Exactly. So he deserves crazy "thanks for keeping me out of jail" sex. Or an "I'm glad your excessive cocaine habit had some positive outcomes" blowjob.
Send me the video of myself under the polar bear skin. It's important.
it's 10:36pm. Do you know where your penis should be?
Apparently that big girl from last night tried to take me upstairs when I was blacked out and all I did was grab Qs arm and whisper 'don't let her take me'
Guess who just enrolled into online classes at Hogwarts? This gal.
I'm in the line at Chipotle thinking: "What combo will best prepare my body for the open bar I'm going to subject it to tonight?"
I need to stop agreeing to hang out with people when I'm drunk.
You told me you didn't want to go to the hospital because you were drunk, but because you didn't want to leave the "fun".
All I have in my purse is 10 cents and a plastic ducky.\nI can't explain last night.
Randomize
